Lonesome Cosmonaut

I’ve always had a touch of social anxiety, but fortunately this is something that is easy enough to overcome with practice. Eye contact is one of the biggest parts of social interaction – you can even have entire conversations with nothing but eye contact.

One of the books I read to help me with eye contact was Michael Ellsberg’s The Power of Eye Contact: Your Secret for Success in Business, Love, and Life. He has a few good exercises that can really improve your eye contact.

• When walking, look at people’s eyes just long enough to see their eye colour. Then move your eyes laterally
• Make longer eye contact with clerks and waiters
• Relax your jaw when smiling
• Look into your friend or partner’s eyes for 3 minutes (this one is a fun one)
• Look into your own eyes in the mirror

There’s been a few other things I’ve found that can help. A big one is working on your posture so that when you walk your eyes are level with the ground, so that you always look straight ahead. This has the benefit of helping you make eye contact right away, as well as giving you a naturally confident gait. Another trick that has worked well is to smile (as naturally as possible) when looking at someone’s eyes – it disarms the direct eye contact, and signals that you are generally interested in the person.

If you follow these tips and tricks, you’ll be able to convey more with your eyes than with your words!

A bizarre dream I had recently:

I’m sitting on the couch in my apartment, reading a book. It’s dark out, I don’t know what time it is but I am tired. As my eyes are about to glaze over, there’s a knock on my door. I don’t know why anyone would be knocking at this hour of the night, but I open the door.

Behind the door is Calgary Mayor Naheed Nenshi. “Hello! Are you Mr. Crosby?”

“Oh, hi mayor.” I’m in disbelief. “Yeah, that’s me. So, um, why are you here?”

“Yes, I’m going door-to-door to make sure that everyone in Calgary knows what’s going on in the city.”

“That’s great mayor. But it’s kind of late.”

“Oh, sorry. What time is it?”

“I don’t know.”

We’re both still standing at the door. Nenshi looks at the clipboard he’s holding.

“Oh dear, I still have 75,000 more to go.”

“Wait, don’t you have a Twitter account?”

“Yes, but I like meeting the people in the city.”

“Well, uh, best of luck with that Mr. Nenshi. See you later.”

“I haven’t told you about the city yet!”

“That’s alright. I’ll call you if I need anything.”

“Oh, okay.”

We shake hands briefly, and as I close the door to my apartment, Nenshi knocks on the door of my neighbor’s apartment.

For the benefit of those who can’t read the eBook version of Sol, Playa y Mar, I’m putting the story up on Lonesome Cosmonaut as well. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I’ve enjoyed writing it. Continue reading »

Hey Canada,
I know we don’t talk as much as we used to. Oh, I’ve been around, and I know you’ve got your thing going on as well. I just happened to notice you shook up your style a bit today, and a lot of people on Facebook were mentioning the same things I was thinking.
I know you’re changing (aren’t we all?), and change can be a good thing. But I just want you to know that if you change too much you’re going to stop being yourself. You’re trying to fit in really hard with those other kids, and you look pretty uncomfortable trying. You’re swinging from one side to the other all the time, and that’s really not that healthy. Are there problems at home, Canada?
Look, I’m not writing this as a part of an intervention or anything – I still think you’re pretty cool. We all do. It’s the land of beavers, maple syrup, and lacrosse as a national sport (just kidding, I know you’ve started recognizing that hockey fad, too). But don’t forget a lot of your good qualities, alright? You just need to chill out a little. We’re looking at a beautiful summer coming up, and Justin Bieber still seems to be a public icon (wow, he really took over Anne Murray’s role, didn’t he).

Best friends forever,
Dave
May 2nd, 2011

I’ve finally decided to dip my toes into digital publishing. I was originally planning on putting it on Amazon, but I’d rather people just read it and skip all the rigamarole of purchasing it. It’s in .epub format, so it should work fine on most e-book readers (or you can read it on your computer for free with Calibre).

I wrote this after I got back from Aruba, and it’s a little love letter to the country, and a reflection on what home is.

Download Sol, Playa y Mar in .epub format